A friend of mine divorced his wife few days ago because he did not want more children & she did. I had to do a lot research before writing this post as I do not have the sufficient Islamic knowledge & I thank the Qari sahab who is Moazan in our mosque, because he was the one who told me & explained me the Islamic teachings on this issue. I tried talking sense into my friend. But since it was his wife who asked for divorce so there is really nothing he can do about it now.
Having a lot of children is something that is encouraged in Islam & the Prophet PBUH urged Muslims to do that. A man once came to the Messenger of Allah & said I have found a woman who is from a good family & is beautiful, but she does not bear children; should I marry her or not? Prophet PBUH told him not to. Then he came second time & something similar & he told him not to marry her. Then he came to him the third time & something similar & he PBUH said: “Marry the one who is loving & fertile, for I shall be proud of your great numbers.”
It is permissible to delay having children for a certain amount of time if that serves an interest, such as if woman is weak or sick. But it is not permissible to do that for fear of poverty or fear of raising children, because that implies thinking negatively of Allah, may He be exalted.
As for us using means of preventing or delaying pregnancy in individual cases where there real & certain harm will result from it, such as if the pregnant woman will have to give birth in a manner other than that which is usual, & she will have to have surgery to bring the child forth, in which case there is nothing in shari’ah to prevent her doing that.
The same applies if it is delayed for other legitimate shari’ah or health reasons confirmed by a trustworthy Muslim doctor.
But if the birth control has to do with the condition of the woman - because she cannot cope with repeated pregnancies - this may be permissible, but it is better not to do it.
If the guy is being a moron & insists on his attitude even though you want a child, then he is doing wrong, but you should not respond to his action by refusing to share his bed, because two wrongs do not make a right. So do your duty & ask Him for your rights. Be patient & seek reward with Allah, & continue to advise him & do not ask for divorce please. Rather you should protect your home & your family, & pay attention to raising your children. Ask Allah for righteous offspring, for it is decreed that a child should be born, that will not be prevented by withdrawal, condoms or anything else.
So, in a nutshell. Make love to your woman & put more babies in her belly & make Prophet PBUH & Allah Almighty proud! :D
Women. Of course.
Tsk. That’s just sad.